My first (and only) successful 365 ended December 31, 2017. For the majority of 2018 I barely picked up my camera, for reasons I’m not completely sure I understand. I’ve always found solace in my photography, but the emotional upheaval of betrayal and eventual divorce seemed to shut down my creativity, and along with it, that particular outlet for my grief. Perhaps it would have just been too painful to see it all in images.
The last few months I’ve felt my camera’s pull again, the desire for creativity, for documenting my life and my loves, for capturing both the grit and beauty around me, for recording someone’s soul through their gaze.
In doing some revamping of my website (hello Fine Art School Portraits!) I inevitably meandered through some of my old work, including my 365. Oddly, I remember every single image I took from that year, but some of the words I wrote along with them I have no recollection of typing, no recollection of even thinking, and no recollection of what prompted them. It’s a bit disconcerting, yet I feel so grateful to have that record of my life. A brief window into my mindset each day of that year.
It’s not January 1st. Not by a long shot. But who says year long projects have to start at the beginning of the year (only my OCD)? And who says it has to be a year long (that’s a really long time, and also not long enough)? Who says it has to be every day (shooting on work days in the winter is hard, not to mention avoiding HIPAA violations if I try to shoot at work)? And who says it has to be just one photo each day (choosing one feels so limiting some days)?
So I don’t know what this will become, but I know I want to shoot more, post more, and write more. So here’s to the future me being able to meander back through these images and words someday!